I'm going to let you into my personal life for a bit. I'll never be ashamed of it, they were programmed to mold the young lady named Emmanuella Somtochukwu Ada Nzelu. Ooh yes, that's my real name and that's my full name as well. Ellahillz is my pen name and I'll tell you the story on how my pen name emerged. Well, it's a story for another day. *winks
As a baby, I had everything I needed and wanted. lol. can't remember all the events though, I was told the numerous stories by some interesting uncles, aunties and cousins.
As a growing child, I remember I didn't have what the rich kids had but Mama kept assuring my siblings and I that we would be just fine. She comforted us so good that I taught we had everything.
As a teenager, Mama worked so hard single handedly to provide for the family, She was true to her words. I remember I had everything I needed but not everything I wanted, Mama was dope like that. She was a Super woman, She gave us her everything, did very alarming and outrageous works to her detriment, all because of we her children and assured us that in the nearest years to come that we'll be so rich and she'll provide us with everything we wanted and not just needed.
As a young adult, on the verge of enjoying my Mama, everything she had nurtured and was still labouring for, death took my Mama away, she was our everything!, She took care of the family bills and of course the bills of other families which included relatives, friends and orphans. I wouldn't be shocked to hear I have an adopted sister or brother somewhere. My Mama was too perfect for days. We all are aware that Bankers are tagged "stingy of all stingies", trust me when I say, "I can relate":...But my mama was the most generous Banker of all time I had seen in my entire life, she sacrificially helped others amidst all odds. We probably would have accumulated a high level of wealth if not for the huge amounts she invested in her health bills and the UNCOUNTABLE RESPONSIBILITY bills. My goodness!, I don't know how she handled all of that amidst the pain and affliction she bore. Well, it's fine, everything was structured to happen that way. When I say she was our everything, I hope you'll amplify your vision and see clearly from the angle I'm coming from. Not just my family was hit and greatly affected by her loss, tons of other families were.
Until her death, my only insecurity was how I would take care of my family...This gave me sleepless nights and teary eyes and then boom....!, death took her away, I was stuck with reality.
I cried so many nights, I mourned a great deal and above all, I was trapped in the pity party address, I was down with self pity of how young I taught I was to lose a mum and most importantly, how tender my younger siblings were to experience such tragedy, the major concern wasn't about me, It was about them (my younger siblings). I was the new mum in line, it was my responsibility to take off from where mama stopped but "I wasn't ready, I wasn't strong enough, taught", every negative thought raced through my heart until I encountered God firsthand, I'm still in the process cos He ain't done with me. He's still cooking me up real good. That singular Firsthand encounter transformed my life and my petty mentality.
Dear friends, You see, God isn't looking for the strongest, but for the willing. He ain't looking at our individual faces and body sizes, He's looking for our hearts.
Are you drowning in self pity over unfinished projects, very poor and unstable background, deformation of character as a result of unhealthy peer groups and pressure, loss of a bread winner, recklessness of a parent(s), laziness possessed by those God place above you to guide you and take care of your every day need, a victim of rape, violence, addiction, a failed relationship and other negative vices?...Get out of that shell now! It's time to arise and radically take back all you deserve and entirely worth, because that's not where you belong, you belong to the lineage of Royalties and Elites. It's a healthy fight that's going to entail many sleepless nights, disappointments, struggle, pain, loss, drama and hard work. And after all of that mess that comes with the struggle, there lies Joy, Joy and more Joy.
Are you still dwindling in that Pity Party Address? He wants you out, Now!
It's an order not a request.
*Today's post is in me memory of my late Mum, Mrs Ogochukwu Florence Nzelu. She left the shores of planet earth exactly 11 months today... She suffered for over 8 years from a sickness she was misdiagnosed of as a result of the lacking technology of our health sector in Nigeria, which led to her untimely death. Please say a short prayer for her today and remember to pray for the health sector and other sectors in Nigeria for a strategic aligned upgrade, Thank you.
Have a great day Fam.
No Blogging without you, Thank You For Visiting.